i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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