do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize