That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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