I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
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