i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
