The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
