They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
