is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
