Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize