We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
