We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
You were trust falling into bushes
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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