I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize