Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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