i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
You need Xanax blowdarts
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
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