I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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