:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
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I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
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If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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