can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
