Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
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