i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
