Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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