I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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