we're blogging at a bar
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Randomize
