All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
