is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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