Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
