im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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