first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis needs a shock collar
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize