I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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