I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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