He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
