Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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