Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
