I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
