It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize