Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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