Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
