Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
