just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
