i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Dignity is for republicans.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
