When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
