i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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