Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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