Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
