Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
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