I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Randomize
