What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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