So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize