i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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