Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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