things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
