why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize