Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
