your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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